October 20, 2005 0

By in Uncategorized

dude, i bet being a male porn star is not as easy as it looks. i was at an audition this evening – for a student film, not quite the caliber of a porn flick, & i had to get emotional for my scene. cry, that’s it. well, i can usually get at least a trickle out in under a minute. but man, the pressure was intense! i was dry as a desert & sitting there trying to get emotional by remembering traumatic events. & they were just sitting there twiddling their thumbs waiting for me to get in my zone. i mean, i wasn’t even misty eyed. the well was dried up & i had to say, sorry guys, it’s not happening tonight. & of course as soon as i get home the tears are flowing, no prob! i felt ok with everything else, but i blew the last lines – the most important part! i should have told them to call me mean names & hit me to get me to cry. i’m that dedicated! so yeah, back to the point, i’m sure this performance anxiety must run in the porn industry as well. sure, you can get an erection any time you want, but just try to get one in a room with a bunch of people staring at you & waiting on you. so like, give those guys props or something, because performance anxiety sucks.

we can only hope that i’m the best of the worst, no? it’s worthwhile, though, for the practice & stuff. yeah.

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