Archive for January, 2003

January 31, 2003 0

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i feel like a million bucks right now. after last night i was expecting to feel like shit run over twice. so this is a nice surprise. it’s great that the fun-o-meter is measured by how bad you feel the next day. kind of a no pain no gain mentality. or something. but man, gotta get this out now, cuz it’ll kill me when i’m older heh.

yeah, so if there’s one thing i can be grateful for, it’s that i will never ever never never ever be That Girl. after last night’s close encounter of the psycho kind, i’ve been inspired to inform you about That Girl. maybe someday i’ll snazz this up & make it a feature, but till then, i’ll give the lowdown. guys. you know That Girl. she’s the girl you try to avoid like the plague. low self-esteem, dependency issues, superficiality, & over all psychoness qualities. she’s the girl with so much emotional baggage, you’re ready to send her a one-way ticket to siberia. & when you do that, this girl will not accept that it’s over. if she’s not calling crying 20 times a day, she’s following you around screaming at you calling you a giant asshole with a small wee wee. once this calms down & you think you are finally free, That Girl will come over to your place at 3 am looking for a little booty. you, being a man, have sex with her, not thinking with the right head. of course, this is a bad idea. That Girl will feel that you are back together. you can tell her she’s a fat disgusting pig & that you are just using her like the cheap whore that she is, but it wont get through that skull. she will still talk about the two of you like you are a couple because she managed to bag you a few times when you were too inebriated to know what was going on. when you pick up a new girl, this will send That Girl into hysterics & probably into an awesome bitch fight. now guys, you think this is bad, right? well, girls. girls girls girls, what do you do when That Girl is your roommate or “friend?” you get the blunt of it. usually That Girl will come home wasted, crying, screaming, & will trash the place. of course, being a “friend” who doesn’t want to deal with the shit, you are forced to listen to hours & hours & hours of bitching & whining & “he still loves me, i know it, why is he doing this to me?” type talk. you also have to be the mediator & take the phone away when they want to make late night drunken calls, & bite your tongue when you want to say “you are a fucking nut job, no shit, no one will ever love you!” wow, this shit is drama & a half. but i do admit i love watching it, as long as i’m not directly involved. i know all of you know exactly the type of chicks i’m talking about. i guess it’s true…chicks really can be evil.

well, i got another thing going for me…i’m not That Girl.

January 30, 2003 0

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my cat died today 🙁

my car battery also died.

what a great day.

yes or no, should i get a chameleon?

January 29, 2003 0

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fuck me, i have a cold. i am so repulsive when i’m sick. everyone is to an extent, but i am nasty & don’t care. i’ve been carrying around my roll of toilet paper cuz i’m too cheap to buy tissues. & the used ones are lying all over the floor & the desk. i also reuse tissues when they dry. the best is when i cough & sneeze all over my food. i don’t bother washing my hands after i blow my nose. i figure, fuck it, i’m sick already. the shit’s oozing all out of my body, what’s the harm in eating it? i am so gross. i’d turn on the cam…great mid-sneeze shots i’m sure. but the link’s not working. i dunno what’s wrong. i haven’t bothered to find out.

i know you guys all get those nigerian email scams all the time. i got bored & looked up shit on them. i ended up finding a bunch of pages from people trying to scam the scammers. this guy writes back to these people pretending to be interested, & he goes as david lee roth. seriously, i was up till 5 am reading this shit. the best one is when he gets the guy to send in a picture holding up a sign with “mr. david lee roth” on it. good stuff, good stuff. this guy poses as a chick, convinces him she’s in amsterdam & sets him up to catch him on a webcam. this almost makes me want to reply to the next one i get. could it be another feature? hmm…we’ll see.

January 27, 2003 0

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good god. that whole experience was depressing as hell. i never want to be without media again. christ. i was seriously moodier than all hell & depressed that i couldn’t go online or watch tv. i was bored & literally sat around & did nothing most of the time. & to top it all off, the vcr ran out of tape so i missed half of scrubs & friday’s days of our lives. i think it’s gonna take awhile to get back on track, cuz these past 4 lonely days fucked me up. time to go catch up on everything. yeah, & the super bowl & commercials sucked. but on a funnier note, & how this came up, i do not know, when i told my mom that i haven’t seen 2001: a space odyssey & that i wanted to see it, she told me to see it stoned.

January 21, 2003 0

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starting tomorrow i have to abstain from tv, the internet & computer, movies, magazines, newspapers, music & books (not school related) until sunday. i have to do this for not one, but TWO classes, so i’m gonna do it. no cheating. but you better believe i’ll be working the loopholes. i know this is really going to suck, but i thought it could be interesting. until i remembered that i will basically be locked in my apartment for 4 days with nothing to do, thanks to sub-arctic temperatures outside. well fuck me 🙁 i have no job & no boyfriend. what the hell am i gonna do? if it was warm out i’d go hiking & do outdoorsy shit, but it’s too cold for that. so now i am really pissed about this assignment, cuz i’d have so much more flexibility if it was at the end of the semester when it’s warm out. seriously, that makes it suck even more. my roommates wont want to hang out with me cuz they always have the tv on. if i could convince them to play board games & puzzles with me, they’d want at least some music on. i am going to have to go to my parents house to play games with them cuz i know my friends will tell me to fuck off when i want to do this in complete silence. my parents will oblige because it’s for school. no one else would cuz no one’s that supportive of me.

i have plans to shop tomorrow…& i will clean & cook, & actually read my books way in advance, & sleep a lot, but i am going to run out of ideas. i think i will resort to hitting the bottle. they say kids with nothing to do are more likely to turn to drugs, & fuck, i don’t even have the computer & tv to keep me from being bored. i will spend my time trying to find drugs i’m sure. especially drugs that will make me not mind staring blankly at a wall for hours on end. i’d go walk around outside if it wasn’t so fucking cold, but instead, i will occupy myself with substance abuse. i see no other choice, really. i think i’m gonna write that in my report. gah. i’m almost tempted to leave my phone # on here cuz i’m allowed to talk on the phone. sure, i’ll go visit my friends, but i know already they aren’t gonna be all excited about being media free when i’m around. they’d be more likely to talk to me on the phone so they can watch tv or whatever on their end. my loopholes are going places where i can’t avoid media. i’m probably gonna be at the bar or parties every night of this experiment thing & i can’t help it if there’s gonna be music there. that’s not really cheating is it? but seriously, i’m not staying in all weekend doing literally nothing so that i don’t subject myself to hearing music playing at a bar. but i will make an honest effort not to watch tv if it happens to be on around me. since i have to keep a journal, i’ll probably end up putting most of that on the site. i already know it will serve for good entertainment. i wont even lie. i am totally dependent on media. almost everyone is, but shit, i can keep myself happy by spending half my day in front of the computer, with the tv or music on. i think like, normal people actually have hobbies & shit. so yeah, i have to start this tomorrow since i want to catch the super bowl, & i need to do this for at least 3 or 4 days. i swear to god i will cry if the commercials suck. i will have to release all this tension on sunday, kinda like finally blowing my load after holding it for so long, so it better be good. well, off to set the vcr…no days of our lives or scrubs :*( …& do a last minute media cram…


January 20, 2003 0

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yes, if you are an eagles fan, then i am a huge asshole. golly, that fourth quarter interception really sucked huh? haha. ok, so i really did want philly to win. i mean come on, i’m probably gonna end up there when i graduate, & you know it’s their last game ever at the field so they just had to win. but they didn’t. & i was a bit pissed cuz i think the tampa bay coach looks like a real dick. he’s the type of guy you’d meet at a frat & just be like, wow, what a cock sucker. you can just tell. so i’m angry he’s going to the super bowl. i’d have loved to see him throw a tempertantrum on the field. but yeah, the reason i must rub it into die hard eagle fan’s faces is because i am a mean sadistic person. i wont ever have to hear the horrible chant again for awhile. & i do have to admit that it makes me giggle thinking that half the town is miserable right now. i don’t give a shit about football, so it’s fun to taunt people who do.

but if there’s one thing i’m excited about, i think the super bowl commercials are gonna be pretty good this year. well, judging on what i saw today. i love the nike commercial with the streaker at the soccer game. it’s great. & i know i just bitched about how much i hate macs not too long ago, but i gotta admit that the commercial with mini me & the genetically engineered 20 foot asian dude is pretty cool. don’t let me down, dammit! the past few super bowl commercials have sucked ass.

right. so…hmm…i was going to bring back a little surprise friday night, but it didn’t work out. we have the good old anti-drinking campaigns around campus, & on thursday, friday, & saturday nights they offer late night activities for people, as an alternative to drinking. so we went friday night, before we hit the bars of course, to do wax hands. you get to dip your hand in wax & get it painted cool colors & shit. i was all about it. so we get there around 9:45 since it started at 9:30. & we waited. & waited. & waited. then got some freshmen to save our spot in line so we could hit the carnival of mysteries for free tarot card readings & handwriting analysis. the handwriting analysis guy was awesome. right on with my roommate, & pretty accurate with me. he was a real cool guy & i’ll post his website when i find his business card. definitely worth checking out. so after all that we get back to the wax hands line & mother fucker, they’d gone through like, 4 people in the past hour. so it was after 11 & there were still about 12 people in front of us so we had to give up on the wax hands. i am real pissed cuz i know they could have done that a bit faster. but since it seemed to be a success, i hope they bring it back again. & this time you better believe i will get there mad early & i will have my wax hand giving the bird. some of the shit they offer for late night is really cool. thing is, it conflicts with drinking time (obviously the point) & people would rather go out then do this stuff. i wish i’d known about this when i was a freshman, i would have done more stuff. basket weaving would be cool, dammit. it’s my last semester, might as well take advantage of what’s offered. chip mock caricatures next saturday! i am a dork & i love it.

January 16, 2003 0

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my apartment is cold. i will sit in a long sleeved shirt, a fleece, sweat pants, & slippers underneath a blanket & still be cold. it doesn’t help that it’s been on average 20 degrees & colder this winter, so we went out & bought this window insulation stuff. it’s kinda like saran wrap & you tape it to the windows then blow dry it so it shrinks & creates an air tight seal around the window so that the draft wont come in. so i did the window in my room cuz it’s right by the computer & my room is one of the coldest in the place. of course i don’t read the directions & i make a big mess out of it. i’ve got it taped all around in a mess, i don’t have it sealed, i’m all like, what the fuck is this doing? so once i saw how it was supposed to work i did it & it looked awesome. seamless, locked, warm. & then i saw that i can’t hang my blinds back up. we have these ghetto ass windows where you can only hang shit from inside the window cavity, the part that is all sealed off. not only that, i can’t smoke in my room now cuz i can’t crack the window to let the smoke out. funny how i’m a smoker but i cannot stand second hand smoke & i don’t want my room all smoky & nasty now. it’s bad enough downstairs. mother fucker. anyway, here’s the stupid naked window.


see, it keeps the heat in but just looks terrible. not to mention people would be able to look into my window, & i don’t think i’d be comfortable with strangers watching me & all. so i figured i’d just try to screw the broken blinds into wall right above the window. they repaint these places after everyone moves out so who cares if there’s some big holes in the wall? but then…my creative juices started flowing & tonight became an arts & crafts night. i decided to hit wal-mart to find some fabric to make curtains with! the shit i bought was the cheap stuff at 2 bucks a yard. since i have no concept of measurement, it’s a good thing there was only 2 yards left of the stuff cuz i was gonna get 4. & i’d have had waaaay too much of this god awful fabric. my mission was tacky. i found tacky, but tacky came at a price apparently. so my mission was tacky and cheap. the $2 fabric, doesn’t get much cheaper than that. & i found it. my blue & purple funky squared fabric. & i got giant metallic push pins to keep them up. they look so great!


eat your heart out martha stewart! not only am i warmer now, but i’m saving money on the gas bill, & i spiced up my room, all for $5! well $5.03 to be exact. i still have that .97 cents in my pocket. that is the worst. getting almost a dollar in change because wal-mart doesn’t have those life-saving give a penny take a penny things & the people behind you in line don’t even check to see if they might have a few lousy pennies to give you so you don’t have a fucking dollar’s worth of change…

yeah, speaking of coins, thanks to new york, i now have like $12 worth of dollar coins. dollar coins are horrible. what do you do with them? i was gonna give one to the pizza boy for a tip but i would have felt like such an asshole. i couldn’t pay for a drink at the bar with one either cuz i would just feel weird. i wouldn’t pay for anything with one, really, if i had to hand it to an actual person. but i finally found a way to get rid of those stupid things. stamp machines at the post office. fuck yeah, it’s all good now.

January 13, 2003 0

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have i told you lately that i hate macs? christ almighty, my page looks like giant dildo poop on a macintosh. it looks great on any pc, but noooo macs have to be all gay & inferior. pieces of shit. did i bitch about macs recently? oh i know i wanted to, but i don’t remember it i did. either way, the last time i was in the lab a mac ate this chick’s disk. hahaha. stupid mac. yeah, so i know i’ve gotten on this every other day posting kick, but i have an hour to kill in this cruddy basement computer lab & nothing to do. i guess i could look at porn…but this chick next to me keeps looking over at my computer. i hope she reads this. & feels like an asshole. the reason i’m in the computer lab is obviously cuz it’s the first day of school & i’m a super dork. instead of going home for 2 & a half hours like normal people, i decide to stick around & find random shit to do, all because i don’t want to lose my shit parking spot. i’ve only been to 2 classes so far, but my personality class looks like it’s gonna be wicked fun.

in sad sad news, one of the bee gees died. the bee gees kicked ass & you know it. disco was totally cool & they were the masters. you all know saturday night fever, wasn’t that soundtrack tight?! if i wasn’t in a lab i’d be singing & disco dancing right now. what is your favorite bee gees song? “stayin’ alive” is definitely one of the best. but i really like “tragedy,” that moves me. i can’t listen to “night fever” without thinking about that stupid long distance commercial. & “more than a woman” never really did anything for me, but you know, it’s starting to grow on me. ooh ooh & there was this other song i liked too, but i don’t remember what it’s called. my parents brought me up on disco when i was young & i can’t thank them more! i think i’m the only person who really really loved the 70s. even though i wasn’t alive back then. so who knows, it might really have sucked like everyone says but i doubt it. yeah, so go download some bee gees shit tonight ok?

ok, so i am really really really hooked on elimination online. basically once survivorcam was over i needed something to fill the void since they took my cu away. well, they made it really really gay. & see for yourself. oh yeah, so i decided to check out elimination. i was mad confused for awhile & i spent hours reading shit, but i got it now & i’m hooked. i don’t watch any of these types of shows on tv (although i kinda got suckered into the joe millionaire thinger out of sadistic nature) but i’m all about these games online. fuck, if they do another survivorcam, i’ll still follow religiously, even though it totally bombed after my victory. e-o’s got that fresh newness deal about it i guess. it’s put together well, so go catch it NOW before you get too behind…

January 13, 2003 0

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i can’t believe i’m thinking about taking a 9 am class in my last semester, all in the name of days of our lives. well, days plays one aspect, but yeah, i hate those little turd burglar communication majors making me have to take a 9 am (if i even decide to take the class). i hate them. i’ve registered for 7 classes because i’m not getting fucked this time. it always happens that a class you take is so horrible that you have to drop it, & since you weren’t expecting it to blow ass, you didn’t think to have a back up. oh not this time. any class i thought i might like i signed up for. then i just go to them all & drop the ones that i don’t like. & it was all going to work out except for that goddamn communications class. i’m not in the major so if i want in, i have to make arrangements with the teacher & i also get stuck with the god-awful class time. man, i’m gonna miss school though. at least every 4 months you get to change your schedule around & take different classes. not to mention all those sweet ass breaks. if i get some office job, it’ll be the same thing day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year. i’m really expecting an office space type scenario, without the whole hypnosis & not going to work thing. when i tell people my major, everyone always asks “is that like, history?” & “what are you going to do with that? be a teacher?” that is not sounding so bad. you get all the breaks. & i could be this mean ass bitch to my kids. of course i’d have to go through more school just to be able to teach, & i’m not about that, but who knows. i’ll have my kids singing hot for teacher. actually i’ll be like mary kay letourneau. i like young boys…

this weekend was bad. i spent $50 just drinking, & for me that’s a lot. what i learned from nyc is to appreciate the college bars here. they aren’t anything special but they don’t charge 8 bucks for a goddamn drink. i don’t even like paying $3. fuck, i’m happy at parties drinking beast. beast is great! but i think my tolerance is going up. low tolerance is a blessing, it truly is. fucking tolerance…pissing me off. ok so my weekend really wasn’t bad, it was just bad from the monetary standpoint. i got to play trivia, and man, my competitive streak really comes out when i’m drinking. don’t even try to fuck with me when i’m in game mode. lord knows what i would have done had i actually done well at trivia. but this needs to be more regular. that shit is the best! & i told some jerkoff i hoped he got arrested. that felt so good. a group of people were stumbling down the street & this drunk dude was heading our way with a cup of beer trying to talk to us. i was all like, ‘i hope you get arrested. yeah, walk by a cop with that open container ok?’ & they all went ooooooh, all like, what a bitch. i love the internet for the fact that i’m taking my online bitchiness out to the real world. good deal.

January 10, 2003 0

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i am so depressed, i don’t know if i can go on living. ever since i got back from vacation i’ve been all excited because oooooh my cute steve madden boots are coming!!!! i couldn’t wait. until i find out that my mom screwed up the order & they aren’t coming. i found them on sale for $50 for christsake! now i can’t find anything cheaper than $100. i am so so sad. sad because i have to pay so much money now. & if i buy them right away, you betcha they’ll be on sale for a hell of a lot less in less than a week. so now i have to wait. wait because i am cheap. weeks…months…who knows. oh how i was looking forward to getting them. fuck.

god dammit i’m such a fucking girl. when did i start caring like this about shoes? & i think i need new sneakers, too, they got a big old hole in the bottom which blows ass when it’s raining. sure, they aren’t water proof, but my shoe is not supposed to fill up with water till my foot is soaked. fucking shoes, i don’t even like shoes… 🙁

yeah, & cu is down. they’re trying to take it down forever & make people pay to use it. oh come on, they’ve tried it before & it didn’t work. i even downloaded all this free trial crap & it didn’t work. it didn’t work at all. i hate this. i have nothing to kill time with now except through tv & housework. i did the dishes & cooked, cleaned the sink & hand washed clothes today. that’s all i did. & that’s a productive day for me. i missed days of our lives because this retarded solar alarm thing i have didn’t want to work & i woke up at 5 pm. 5 pm! the sun was ready to set by the time i got out of bed. what is wrong with me?!?!?! at least i’m trying to motivate myself to work on the site a bit. i finally put up my survivorcam crap. good god that took forever to do. i have decided adding new content will not be high on my priority list because not only am i in a creative shit hole, but it just takes waaay too long. not only that, i got a new voicemail # cuz my trial expired. i don’t know why since only 3 people called. call it & leave fun messages for me, you assholes! what da dilly?? all right, enjoy. & pray for my steve madden lusst boots. come to mommy, please.