Archive for January, 2005

January 22, 2005 0

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r.i.p. mary. get well, r.i.p. floyd. i think an epidemic of plague has broken out in my new fish tank. i got it all set up last week & disregarded almost everything the pet store people told me. & now my fish are dying, slowly, one by one. & they’re eating each other. they’re eating each other while they’re still alive, which is creepy. god dammit, this sucks. i love my fish.

& in other news, mother nature is trying to cock block me again. bitch, go take your midol & step the fuck off…seriously…

January 19, 2005 0

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i like the new intern…even if she is a christian! today we got high off fumes & she got chemically burned while i talked on the phone. i also made her help carry frames out of the cold cold attic & help drag the christmas trees to the side of the road.

we’ve gone on fun field trips to the post office, subway, & your building center. i try real hard to arrive on time so i don’t look like a slacker & to not say “shit”, “fuck” & “oh my god”. she likes working here & calls herself my protégé. well i don’t remember if that was exactly how she said it, but that’s totally what she meant. i apologize profusely when i have nothing for her to do except photocopy. we just turn on our space heaters & talk about such diverse topics as her wedding, body hair, periods, and shit that really goes on at the penn state campus (she’s also a campus cop). & occasionally i’ll go off tangents about gay rights & how even though i’m not religious, i’m not running off in the night eating babies. god only knows what she really thinks of me…

while i do miss not having the place to myself (mainly to turn the radio up really loud & sing & dance when good songs come on & to talk to myself), i’m glad i didn’t get stuck trying to get the shitty lead paint & plaster off this stupid picture frame by myself. i would have burned my hand off & probably burned the mansion down. & i’ve got someone to pass off the shitty work stuff to!

January 14, 2005 0

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now you know i’m not one to brag…in fact, i’d like to think i’m quite modest. but my parents got something in the mail yesterday & i really just want to rub it in your faces. yeah, so let’s get it out in the open. i am better than all of you. you see, i was recognized for something…something only the highest-achieving students are even considered for. i’m a somebody – a pretty important somebody now – & it’s about time someone realized that & honored me with such a prestigious honor. i have been recognized for outstanding academic achievement by who’s who among american high school students®. can you believe my mom laughed at me & tried to make me feel like i wasn’t important & that this letter didn’t mean anything? i would think that falls under child abuse – mental belittling! maybe she’s just jealous of my success, i don’t know. & i know you might think i’m lying since people on the internet lie to try to make themselves look cooler than they really are. but oh no, i am not lying. read it & weep you jealous bitches!!!!!!!!!

my achievement letter

January 6, 2005 0

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beijing modern dance company

An ensemble of 12 ultra-hip, trench coat-clad young dancers perform a hard-edged, high-energy piece to the 1982 album The Wall, by rock group Pink Floyd. With an industrial-strength set and lighting design, this performance evokes an intriguing new interpretation of the seminal rock album. Choreographed by Li Han-Zhong and Ma Bo, Rear Light reflects a young Chinese generation struggling to reconcile its traditional culture with influences from abroad and a thirst for freedom.

One of China’s most fascinating and acclaimed dance companies, Beijing Modern Dance Company was formed in 1995 and includes some of the finest dancers and choreographers working in China today. The award-winning company has toured extensively in Germany, France, and most recently at the opening of the new Esplanade Theatre in Singapore.

i am sooooooooooooo excited, i cannot wait to go see this! i will even pay regular admission instead of trying to pass as a student & pay $17 less! i freaked out when i read it in the paper, & now i’m going to – get this – get up early & go before work at like, 8:30 so i can get the best seats that are left. i’m pissed i didn’t hear about this sooner, i would have been all over that shit trying to get right up front.

coffeeshop pink floyd!!!!! ok it’s official…i am going to amsterdam & i am going to this place. & i will probably start crying when i walk through the doorway. someday i will go to europe, & now i have got to make sure to hit amsterdam & have coffee here. this is tempting me to go sooner rather than later…but my god, how sweet is this?! oh & hey, since you know how much i love the floyd, someone should get me the 2005 wall calendar off my wishlist…right? i think so!

January 3, 2005 0

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alright, so it’s a new year & i’m a year older. i guess that makes it more “special” for me as far as new beginnings & things go. for once i actually have a legit resolution, instead of the vague old “try to be a better person & make the most of life” thing i usually go for. i will start being more on time! i don’t want to set unrealistic goals like being on time all the time, so i’ll just start with an improvement & work my way from there.

2004 was a pretty ok year. of course if you ask me to list all that happened, i couldn’t really think of all that much. the old “so what have you been up to?” “um……hmm…..not much, really” conversations i’ve been having as of late. but it really wasn’t a bad year at all. my first major short term goal of the new year was not to start it off like last year – sleeping in my own vomit & not caring. you could say i was just a tad hungover. so this year i defiantly turned down many offerings of free drinks so i could keep my wits about me. besides, i’m old now. i do wonder how this year will turn out though, since out of all the bars in state college, i pick the one my ex was out. but out with the old boyfriends, in with the new, i say. i still can’t think if that & the abundance of cat shit on the first is any indication of how the rest of the year will be. no lie, there was a fresh fat turd on the bathroom floor when i got home, & then later a turd droplet on my bed. perhaps a shitty year is in store? or maybe it’s one of those things where shitty things happening is really a sign of good luck? whatever, who cares, i’m thinking this year will be pretty ok. how about you?