Archive for March, 2005

March 30, 2005 0

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today was the first nice spring-like day, and so, i had to go out walking. as i’m walking, i look at my pants & it looks like someone spooged on my one leg. nice! these pants really are the pits…the butt pocket is half ripped off, the knees are discolored, they’re really baggy & unflattering & now there’s a spooge mark. i’m pretty sure it’s just water & it will probably wash off, but yeah.

we have a new “pet” at work. some crazy dude who has all these weird pets lives across the street, & lately his pet turkey, betty, has been breaking out & coming over to our yard. who can blame her, the grounds are gorgeous! she follows you around if you’re outside & will just sit down on the ground right in front of you. i was gonna get my picture taken with her, but her owner came to pick her up. i’m not really outside much, so it’s crazy that i happen to be outside when she’s over, but i like her & i hope she comes back. maybe we can keep her. well, maybe not….turkey shit all over the ground wouldn’t be cool. & she crosses a major road to come over. but i like her.

& speaking of work, IS THIS NOT THE CUTEST THING EVER?!?!?!?!

from our easter egg hunt on saturday…i was chasing the kid trying to get his picture


anyway, this week kicks off pride week, & you know what that means…drag queens, bitches! fuck yeah!! drag show is thursday night & i had to restrain myself from doing the happy dance at work when i found out. & not only that, but i’m a volunteer usher for the one in 10 film festival, ushering appropriately for the pink mirror, a hindi drag queen movie. i earn the gold star for diversity, baby, volunteering for the queer film festival & a native american powwow next weekend. now all i need to do is make friends with a black person!

March 25, 2005 0

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hell, i should have just written about my week the last time i posted, because it magically went stagnant after hump day. right, so lets rewind to last week: so i’m flying home sunday night on the red eye, all night, straight into 9 a.m. monday morning where i go to work. all i want monday night is to get a nice night of sleep so i can function at work. but oh no, i spend monday night in the emergency room. luckily i was not the one being treated…let me tell you, there would have to be something really really wrong to get me into the emergency room on no insurance. anyway, quite the heart pounding night, let me tell you. & my dumb ass was like, ‘yeah i wanna go to the emergency room, too! it’s like a field trip!!!!!!!!!’ of course i regretted it as soon as we got there because even though there was barely a soul there, we had to stick around until 2 a.m. then on tuesday i got my period. wednesday was so fun at work when i found a dead mouse in the trap. i felt loads guilty since the cute little thing was dead because of me. i can’t tell you how many times i tried to pick it up only to run off screaming & going ewewewewewwwwwwwwwwwwewwwwwwwww EWEYYYY!!!!!! running around like a crazy person. eventually the intern’s fiancĂ© had to come get rid of it. & then, wanting a nice evening at home, i was interrupted by a group of people who were locked outside of my work. the girl who was supposed to let them in forgot, so i had to haul ass to go let them in & then go back to lock up 2 hours later. my shitty ass week. but then thursday was pretty neutral for me, as was friday & saturday. the intern got some of my best week ever when she locked her keys in the car, received something that had broken in the mail & couldn’t watch csi because of the basketball.

anyway, the guy didn’t call, but it must be because he lost my #…which is what i will tell myself. i thought we were getting along, but i guess he was just being nice since he was stuck talking to me. you know how when you’re out at a bar or party or something & the buddy you’re with meets someone of the opposite sex…but then you’re stuck having to talk to their friend who’s ugly/loserish? well apparently i was the loser friend! but that’s not the worst of it. you all know about my strong disdain for livestrong bracelets……………well, this dude wore one. AND he went to church. i was gonna let it slide, you know, since he was cute & all. but man…i got dissed by someone who wears a livestrong bracelet & goes to church. i used to think i was awesome, but my self esteem has really shot down to that of a fat chick.

March 17, 2005 0

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car is fixed. it was an alignment problem & some fucked tires, no biggie. tahoe was great. besides getting a sick, i had fun. i didn’t ski, although i did snowshoe up a mountain. we had a great view of the lake & little birds would fly down from the trees to eat granola out of your hand. um….i gambled & fucking loved the 1 cent video poker. i even walked away up $20 thanks to blackjack, after having not such great luck with roulette. awesome!! there was the most amazing sunset the second night i was there, but i didn’t have the camera & the rest of the sunsets weren’t anything special. i’ll get pictures up eventually. there are soooo many to go through & all the good ones are on other people’s cameras, but i’ll get them eventually.

so, guess who’s having the

i should totally win this

if i don’t die by the end of the week, which seems like the natural progression, then i’ll tell you. i can’t wait for the next 2 days, OH BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! do i see alcohol poisoning, a dui, or a leprechaun gangbang for tomorrow? lets wait & see!

& here’s my ghetto poll for my loving fans. i’m too lazy to find some lame voting thingy so you’ll just have to leave a comment, bitches:


(if no, please include the reason & make it good!) bets are also being taken on whether or not i will drive myself insane with my female neurosis before i even get the answer.

so far we got 2 yes votes. polls close saturday night.

righty-o…coming up: the best week ever, tahoe pictures, & poll results!!!!!

March 3, 2005 0

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when i dated a mechanic, nothing really went wrong with my car. but oh how i miss him now. ever since i got back from new york my car has been shaking. i’m a fan of the if i ignore it maybe it will go away philosophy, but apparently everyone thinks this shaking is really bad. i was minutes away from having my tire fall off one time, so that should give you an idea of when i take care of problems. so yeah, i don’t want to go back because i was just there. but i guess i have to, doesn’t look like it’s going away.

& i’m sure this makes me look like an ungrateful sack of shit, but i’m not as excited about going to lake tahoe as i should be. even though it’s 20 degrees warmer, it’s still gonna be cold & i’m irritated that most of the touristy things are only open in the summer. i imagine it will be gorgeous there & i’ll hike a bit, but i don’t like cold! & i don’t ski. i have to share a one room townhouse thing with 2 snorers which i think is bumming me out the most. god, i know i’ll have a good time & christ, it’s a free trip, but i’m just not feeling it right now. maybe i’ll win at the casinos. that would totally rule. actually, if i broke even but still got to play a lot i would be more than thrilled. argh, i need to psych myself up! anyone know of something cool to do there?