Archive for April, 2005

April 28, 2005 0

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man, i was walking around wal-mart with a “hello, my name is 69” name tag on my stomach. i forgot i was wearing my audition #…whoops! anyway, this week is auditions for the state college community theatre so i decided to go for it. while the experience wasn’t traumatizing, i don’t think i’ll be getting a call back. you audition in a group & the directors give you a scene to read. i know one of the directors, but his play didn’t really have any parts for young girls. anyway, i’ve read the plays in advance, & i’m thinking the parts i’ll be up for are maggie in lend me a tenor & deirdre in i hate hamlet. the part i get to read is this old new york real estate lady from i hate hamlet – a part i wasn’t preparing for, so that kinda sucked. the director actually told me to read the part of this really old german lady & i’m thinking, christ, are you kidding?? i must be not at ALL what they want. but even though she told me the page with the old german lady on it, she really wanted me to read the real estate lady. so i dunno, i don’t think i was all that great. it’s nice, though, since i’m not expecting to get a part…i will be very pleasantly surprised if i get a call! so…? yeah. i guess i’ll hear back by may 7. it’s kinda like when i met that dude (er, except i was expecting him to call)…as each day goes by without a call, my hope slowly dies. i hope i get a part, though, i really do. i need something to do this summer. argh.

April 22, 2005 0

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i won free tickets to see sting next tuesday! it was awesome. i don’t even care to see the show! but you know, i’ve been doing a lot of stuff for free…it’s really pretty cool. lately i’m always doing things & there’s so much to do for a town this size, thanks to the college. & it’s so inexpensive here. anyway this weekend is no exception, it’s blue & white weekend, so there is lots to do & people to see. i’m really kinda tired & out of it right now…my brain’s not functioning. oh well!

April 14, 2005 0

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i love fruit tart. more than anything else i can think of right now. so when we had tart at work last wednesday, i made my love of tart clear to all around. there was a little left & i was ecstatic to know that it was all mine. mine. all mine. i didn’t get around to eating it during the week due to the abundance of food left in the fridge, but no worries. i took it home over the weekend, but didn’t get around to eating it there due to the abundance of perishable food at my house, so i brought it back to savor it at work on monday. see, i had to enjoy it to it’s fullest, like be really hungry & say, oh fuck yeah, my tart is ready to be savored!! well, i didn’t eat it on monday & was going to bring it home monday night because i was really going to eat it for real this time. only i realized i’d left it in the fridge once i’d hit the road. i contemplated going back for it, but i for real was going to savor it tuesday. tuesday rolls around & i don’t bring any food to work because i am so ready for my fruit tart. i go to get it in the afternoon & the fridge has been cleaned out. NO TART. the tart is missing. it has only been a week & it had been moved from it’s box to a tupperware container, so it’s not like i had forgotten, oh no. & there’s no empty tupperware around, like it had been tossed. my tart was GONE. i was enraged! i have this little magnet of facial expressions & a slidey thing you can move over which expression you are feeling. it was moved quickly to enraged. my tart is gone! tears were ready to roll. even if a week is questionable, i don’t care, i love tart so much i would eat it willingly…risking diarrhea & food poisoning. i am pissed off. still! no matter how much tart i eat to make up for it, there will always be the little tart i never had. the tart that most likely made it’s way to the garbage (along with my tupperware). that sucks. & my retarded ass made a collage of tart…so that every time i go to my site for the next 3 posts, i will see the tart collage & salivate. i was seriously salivating searching for those images. i love tart! god, i would marry fruit tart if i could.

i love tart

& i’m also pissed that i missed the elephants! the circus is in town & they paraded the elephants up college ave. i literally don’t have to move from my desk, i can turn my head to the left to see the street from the window. i could have seen the elephants go by! but no one told me when they were coming. & i missed them.

yesterday was SHITTY.

April 10, 2005 0

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i am inspired to write about the first time i got drunk, thanks to carina. she was talking about how she loves v&s sandwiches, yet this place only reminds me of the first time i got drunk & how i puked all over the bathroom.

anyway, let’s remember this monumental point of teenage development. i was 15 years old & going to my first party. this chick nina used to have parties at her house & while you couldn’t drink on her property since she lived with her mom, you could drink around the property. so i was the smart one who just happened to be with the 21+er who bought the beer for us minors, & we head off to the woods to start our night. well, we ended up taking most of the beer & heading to the park. there i have 5 beers, which, shit, when you’ve never had beer before is A LOT. & this is great, as we’re leaving to walk downtown, i actually puke while i’m walking. no stopping to toss my cookies in the bushes, i straight puke while i’m walking & don’t miss a beat. they’re asking if i’m ok & i’m like, ‘yeah dude, i’m cool!’ so we make our way downtown. & we end up at v&s sandwiches. this is where i puke all over the bathroom. i thought i made it all in the toilet & i was all proud of myself for being such a good aimer, but apparently it was all over the place. whatever, no biggie. as we’re leaving, i run into my huge high school crush & i’m nothing short of like, “oh my god i love you!!!!! it’s him!!!!!! ooooooh@@@!!@!#!%!!!” embarrassing. but that’s nothing new. so we end up at the local arcade hangout, campus casino (r.i.p. <3) apparently i was saying al this crazy shit to some guy i knew (so he says - although i don't remember this at all), but it's plausible & HEY, I WAS DRUNK FOR THE FIRST TIME! from there, some guy who happened to live in my neighborhood drove us to one of the dude's we were hanging out with's house where the girl & i spent the night on crashed on the living room couches. we hail a cab, hungover to all hell (but remember, this was still the most awesomely bad experience of my 15 years on this planet) back to the house of the party to find out the chick, melanie's makeup bag had been stolen. at this point i'm ready to be home, & alas, that was my night. i don't even remember what i told my parents - probably that i was staying at melanie's. it still holds a special place in my heart. & i still always think of this night when v&s sandwiches is mentioned. ahh, & this is why i'm really bummed i never kept a diary. it's those golden times of high school that would make for some great reads right about now. i can only look back to the past few years that i've happened to blog about. god, i really wish i had a diary, man! although i'm sure most of it would be more embarrassing than not... anyway, my fellow readers, share your first time drunk stories in the comments!

April 7, 2005 0

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it’s a good thing my dad isn’t abusive. i’d have a hell of a time explaining how i got a shiner for talking during the engaging dialog of bad santa.

April 5, 2005 1

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i hate rusted root. god i really really really really fucking hate rusted root. like, i really hate them. a lot. i hate rusted root more than dave matthews band. i hate them so much that i’m taking time out of my busy schedule to blog about how much i hate them. they’ve played here a gazillion times & they’re back for movin’ on this year. & the sad thing is that they’re the “best” draw we’ve been able to get. barf. but i still might volunteer at movin’ on this year…i can’t help it, it’s the compulsive volunteer in me (& really, the free shirt). so long as i do not volunteer during fucking rusted root. i’ll work one of the other shitty bands i’ve never heard of. & i’ll only volunteer if i can do security. hell yeah! but i really wouldn’t let me be security. a cancer patient could probably whoop my ass, have you seen my arms?! but still that would totally rule to work security, if they’ll let me. so i think i will try. i hate rusted root.

April 2, 2005 0

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dude the pope totally stole terri shiavo’s thunder! it’s been nothing but terri in the news for the past few weeks & then she finally dies…makes the headlines, right? then mr. pope is on his death bed & he takes over the headlines. when i saw he was on a feeding tube i just about lost it…you know, with the whole shiavo thing. hahaha. & can you believe i told this to my catholic intern? & she didn’t seem too offended, not like the time we got into a discussion about euthanasia & i said jack kevorkian was a great man. you should have seen the look on her face when i said that hahahaha. oh well, it’s all good in the hood, right kids?