Archive for March, 2007

March 20, 2007 0


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i am really excited that the transportation security administration says that i’m allowed me to bring unlimited amounts of ky jelly and prosthetic breasts aboard an airplane. i am really tempted to fill my carry-on bag with nothing but 3-ounce tubes of ky jelly…

peace out.

March 7, 2007 0


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i am a huge shithead. i am moping about all the things i’m going to miss in pennsylvania because i’m going to be in hawaii instead. is that ungrateful or what?! in all fairness, the end of march is super busy as far as things go, and they are all totally legitimate. but, something tells me i will forget about all these things and probably have a pretty ok time in hawaii. you think?

anyway, who’s got ideas for things we must do in hawaii? send ’em my way, as we’re still planning out our trip…


state college

March 2, 2007 0

military sentence??

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lately i’ve taken to kinda paying attention to the news. my area of focus is lifestyles, entertainment, local, and cnn’s top stories. i still haven’t a clue of what’s going on in the foreign world, as i opt to not read those stories, but i’m at least educating myself on what’s going on in pennsylvania and at penn state (stop whining, you little shits). whenever i come across an interesting story, i like to pass it on to friends, like when the pennsylvania supreme court ruled that viewing child pornography on a computer is no longer a crime or that there’s a rise in dating sites for people with STDs. i also like to find really ridiculous stories to gather for my myspace profile under the caption “news stories i wish were written about me”.

anyway, sometimes i come across stories that make me want to bang my head against the desk and go whyyyyyyyyyyy?

Men pick military as sentence. so, some kids got drunk and ended up shooting someone’s cow. when it came to sentencing, the prosecutor wanted probation and community service, but the judge wanted to give them a choice of 3 different sentences.

Their actions, he said, were too serious an offense to warrant merely probation, saying they had “crossed that line of decency.” He noted the pain they caused the cow’s owner. They’d been drinking heavily, and driving around with a loaded rifle looking for something to kill. Their actions, he said, “were premeditated, senseless and your motivations were evil.”

so what’s a good punishment for people with evil intentions who drive around looking for things to kill? hey! they should join the MILITARY! good god and you wonder why people were being tortured at guantanamo bay…